Monday, December 9, 2013

My Dad

WHOOOOOOAAA!

That was the sound I often made while flying through the air after my dad would throw me off his shoulders into the pool landing with a big splash! He'd toss all three of us, my twin sister and older brother, around like a sack of potatoes!  I loved it.  For me it was better than any water slide or diving board.  

Being thrown off of dad's shoulders was a memory that I'll never forget.  

To me, he was the strongest guy I knew.  Quite honestly, my dad was a strong guy, always working out at the YMCA, pumpin' iron as he would say.  Maybe thats where I get my love for working out?  (I almost said love for fitness, but to me fitness incorporates proper nutrition and dads usual lunch of bologna sandwiches and pork rinds is not how I roll these days! ha!)

Maybe it was the times in church when my twin sister and I would fight each other for who got to sit on dad's lap that Sunday, or the countless hours he spent with me working on softball, basketball and golf.  He even taught me how to kick field goals, telling me about the one time "back in the day" he made a 54 yard field goal in the Air Force.  The guys called him "slow", because, well, the as they say, the proof is in the pudding.  Somehow I turned out pretty fast.  I guess the "slow" genes skipped a generation :)

My dad always went out of his way to make fun of me and my sister.  Back in high school to us it was a mortal sin to wear anything from Walmart and so my dad would go out and purposefully buy Walmart jeans and shoes then flaunt them like a supermodel whenever our friends were around. Every time I gave him the death glare he didn't care it only made him try harder!   

My dad always taught me the value of a dollar.  Which I still carry on to this day, so really, I'm thankful he flaunted Walmart jeans and Dr. Scholl's.  In the end it taught me a lot about what's really important.  

My dad grew up poor, his father passed away when he was nine and his mother never re-married and so it was just my dad, his brother and my grandma.  They made it work, together, but not without some struggles.  Because my grandma had to work so much to provide she'd come home and cook for the boys, but I imagine in her exhaustion would find herself burning the food a lot.  My dad to this day still loves to eat burnt food.  If there was ever a burnt cookie, it went to dad, because that's what he prefers.  

When I was in high school we were asked to write a paper about "our hero".  I wrote about my dad.  For me, high school was a terrible time.  I dealt with depression and felt terribly lost and hopeless, but my dad was always there for me, believing in me, praying for me and encouraging me.  His love was what got me through most days.  He was so patient.  I am so thankful for my dad.  

My dad showed me how a Father is to love his daughter.  Sure it wasn't perfect and my dad is not a perfect man, but he is a good man who would do anything for his children.  I'm certain of that.  He sacrificed so much time to spend with us, invest in us and encourage us.  

My dad's love for me reminds me of God's love for me.  My earthly father has given me a glimpse into who my Heavenly Father is and for that I am so grateful.  

Today my dad turns 65.  Over the years I've seen him grow so much in his faith and I'm praying for many more great years with my dad.  I still have so many things to learn from him.  He's still the one I go to when I need advice about guys! And if I ever do get married I'll need him to walk me down the aisle :)

Happy birthday dad.  I love you!  And I'm so thankful for you.  


Friday, December 6, 2013

Cultural Exegesis: Mother Monster

Six years ago, Stefani Germanotta didn’t have much of a voice to teenagers, but now, as Lady Gaga, she’s a household name.  She’s a gifted and talented woman.  She’s got a big crowd of followers too. Should we as adults be concerned?


The Lady Gaga Story
Lady Gaga, grew up in the Catholic School system-attending Covenant of the Sacred Heart.  After high school she enrolled in New York University where she dropped out after her freshman year to pursue music full time.  She hit it big when she signed a deal with Interscope records and dropped her first single “Just Dance” which quickly shot to #1. 

She quickly rose to the top in 2008 with three number one hits off of her debut album.  Becoming an overnight success she dropped an EP in 2009 that only furthered her success as an international superstar.  Her second studio album, “Born This Way”, was released in 2011,  selling around 8 million copies worldwide.  Just this past year in 2013 she released her third studio album, “ARTPOP” which is receiving mixed reviews, but her fans continue to remain loyal to her.  

What’s the draw?
Is it the outfits?  She has worn some crazy outfits, dressing up as meat, or with a crazy amount of Kermit the frogs on herself, but that’s not the real reasons kids are drawn to her. 

In an article in the Guardian magazine we can have a greater understanding as to why so many teenagers are drawn to this woman,

To her hardcore fans (or "Little Monsters"), she's not only the greatest pop star on the planet, but a sort of cult leader whose mantra of self-love, implemented on her last album Born This Way, acts as their Bible. (2)

Selling out all over the globe, Gaga looks at her adoring fans and see’s young people who are hurting with a desire to be accepted and loved.  She has been given a platform through her music to speak to the generations of teenagers that feel like they never quite fit in.  She often shares how she was bullied in school, which a lot of kids can relate with and so they feel a connection with her through her music and her story.    As quoted earlier in The Guardian Magazine these kids are looking to her as their leader.  She calls her fans “little monsters” and they adoringly call her “Mother Monster”.  They look to her words as their source of truth.  They allow her lyrics to become their voice and through it their minds are being shaped by the words that she preaches from her music.  She even believes that she has revolutionary potential,

Someone said to me, 'If you have revolutionary potential, you have a moral imperative to make the world a better place.' And my fans are a revolution. They are living proof that you don't have to conform to anything to change the world."(3)

I find it really ironic that Lady Gaga is quoted as saying that she doesn’t believe her fans have to conform to anything in order to change the world when in reality they are conforming to her message. 

Gaga told Elle magazine that she writes about what she knows: sex, pornography, art, fame obsession, drugs, and alcohol (1).  It seems to me like Gaga’s got something more to say to our teenagers than “Just Dance”.

Although her music has a great draw to young people.  It doesn’t offer lasting hope.  One young fan wrote a tribute to Lady Gaga thanking her for the impact she’d made upon his life right before he took his own life.  He shared how the song “Born This Way” spoke to him. (4)  Although the song spoke to him, it certainly didn’t offer true healing from his pain. 


The Message

What exactly is Mother Monster’s message then that is spreading to her little monsters all over the globe?

Gaga admits that her life experiences have shaped a lot of the messages she sends in her music, I had really tried to hide a lot of my pain from my past in the last few years," she says towards the end of the interview, whereas at the Roundhouse a new song, Swine, is introduced with, "My heart, my skin and my pussy felt like trash. (2)

She also shares in an interview with Rolling Stone, This huge wound that had been inside of me for so long that I had buried in drugs and alcohol and older men and over and over in a cycle of just unhappiness with myself and looking outward to fix it, to numb it. My fans forced me to respond to it."(3)

A lot of kids can relate with a wound inside of them.  Gaga chooses to fill that wound with sex, alcohol and drugs.  She even admits to feeling like trash, which a lot of kids can relate with as well.  To her life is really just one big party and we can see that through her music in songs like “Sexy Ugly”

Everybody wants to be like us,
Filthy glamorous.
We know how to party
Sexy ugly.
Rock like us, silly and gorgeous.
Real Hot Body
Sexy ugly.

She said she feels like trash and the message comes across loud and clear in songs like “Do What U Want”.  In a duo with R. Kelly where the song becomes overtly sexual, Gaga spreads a message that your body is just something to be used.  It’s no wonder she feels like trash.

You can’t stop my voice, cause
You don’t own my mind, but
Do what you want with my body

She also sends messages to teenagers about who God is.  Growing up in the Catholic school system she’s created some of her own thoughts about Jesus.

In the most Biblical sense,
I am beyond repentance
Fame hooker, prostitute wench, vomits her mind
But in the cultural sense
I just speak in future tense
Judas, kiss me if offenced,
Or wear an ear condom next time

I wanna love you,
But something’s pulling me away from you
Jesus is my virtue,
Judas is the demon I cling to
I cling to

She goes on further to share her own thoughts about what God would have to say about human sexuality.  In her song, “Born This Way” she supports all types of sexuality encouraging her listeners to accept the fact that they were born bisexual or homosexual.  God makes no mistakes and so they can’t help it that they were just born that way.    

I'm beautiful in my way
'Cause God makes no mistakes
I'm on the right track, baby
I was born this way

A different lover is not a sin
Believe capital H-I-M (Hey hey hey)

The message is coming across loud and clear.  Life is all about pleasure.  It’s all about sex and God is not the ultimate source of truth, you are.  God shouldn’t be feared, so we should feel free to embrace the party lifestyle and live our life however we please. 

Lady Gaga impresses a message of pure destruction on young people that is filled with deception, encouraging teenagers to explore their sexuality, let others use their bodies however they please and make life into one big party.  yet we let our teenagers listen to her music without a second thought.   I’ll admit the tunes are catchy, but the message is catching the hearts of young people in the wrong way as they buy into the message she is sharing.  

How Should We Respond?

As Christians we need to practice wise discernment when it comes to the music we allow our children to listen to.  I believe there a few guidelines that we as adults can follow;

1.     Understand that there is an enemy.  I believe one of Satan’s greatest tools for deception is through music.  Music has a way of connecting with people in a way that is unique unto itself.  We must recognize as Christians that some music is purely demonic.   Satan has an agenda and there are such singers like Lady Gaga whom he is using to get his message across. 

2.     Affirm Lady Gaga’s gifts.  She obviously has been given some great gifts musically.  There is no question that she is a talented woman.  However, we should be teaching our children that our gifts are to be used to further God’s kingdom for His greater glory.   These gifts were given to her by God, but unfortunately the choice has been made to use them for evil instead of for good. 

3.     Understand that the type of music your child listens to is a window into their world.  If your child feels a connection with someone like Lady Gaga why is that?  Are they hurting?  Do they feel like an outcast that no one understands and they feel a certain connection with someone like Lady Gaga who dealt with rejection and being bullied herself? Are they confused about their sexuality?  Don’t take these realizations lightly.  The music your child listens to can you help you better understand their world and their struggles.  Then, ask them why they listen to certain music.  Try to understand where they are coming from and why.

4.     Set boundaries on the music you allow your child to listen to.  It’s ok to be the bad guy, you’re the parents and one of your roles in raising your child is to protect them from things that would be harmful to them.  We know that ingesting poison would be a terrible idea for our children to do, so of course we would keep them from doing that, but what about the poison that can distort their minds through music?  It’s our role as adults to keep them from ingesting that poison.

5.     Recognize that the music industry does not have your child’s best interest in mind.  The mainstream music industry is out to make money.  That is their number one concern.  Their influence has nothing to do with helping raise whole, healthy human beings.  It has everything to do with doing whatever it takes, even if they know the message is fleeting and harmful, to make as much money as possible. 

6.     Find Christian music that is similar to the style of music your child likes.  As a Youth Worker I have had multiple experiences where after introducing a student to a Christian band they are blown away with how much they like them and often make the comment that they like the Christian music better than the mainstream stuff.  Students often don’t know of other music out their because its never been introduced to them and so we as adults need to have a good grasp of the Christian music out there that is life giving and full of the gospel message.  Just make sure its up to date and not the band you use to jam to “back in your day”.    

7.     Take your children to the Bible.  If they are listening to music that is contrary to scripture they are going to be confused about what the right worldview is.  Take them to the Bible and help them understand it.  Teach them what God’s word has to say.  Don’t just tell them their music is bad; help them understand why.  Kids don’t often see the “bigger picture” of things and we as adults need to help them understand the fullness of God’s plan for our lives.  In doing so they’ll better understand why God would want to keep them from listening to certain music.

8.     Recognize that children have been wounded.  We all have a deep longing to be loved and somewhere along the line a child has experienced some type of heartache that they will try to remedy.  They will follow the popular ways of the culture and the message that Mother Monster tries to preach to them if we don’t give them the hope of the gospel.  As parents and mentors we need to be teaching our young people the truth of the gospel.  Jesus came to set them free and to heal their wounds.  This message offers so much hope and we have the joy of sharing it with those who are desperately hurting. 

9.     We should share Lady Gaga’s compassion to reach the hurting. She makes it quite clear that she wants to try to reach out to those who have been bullied or have been made to feel like an outcast.  We too should have the same approach.  We can learn something from her in that regard, but we obviously need to have a different approach with our message. 

10. Realize the real problem is sin.  We live in a fallen world where sin has come in and tainted what God had originally made good.  We have a responsibility now as Christians to help redeem music and bring it back to the goodness God intended for it.  We can’t play around with sin though and expect not to get burnt by it.  Allowing our young people to listen to music like Lady Gaga’s will only set them on a slippery slope, even if its just one or two songs.  Help your child instead recognize that God has called them to a great purpose in helping redeem music and use any gifts they might have musically for God’s glory. 

Summary

Lady Gaga has been given a stage, a microphone and a platform to speak into the lives of young people.  We as adults need to understand that there is an enemy who wants to pull out kids away from the truth.  Satan wants to use people, like Lady Gaga, to preach destructive messages to our kids.  Let’s not fear the battle, but lets engage the culture.  Seeking to understand so that we can reach out children with the truth of the gospel message.  

Bibliography

11. .people.com/people/lady_gaga/biography/
2 2.  theguardian.com/music/2013/sep/03/lady-gaga-people-think-im-finished
33.  rollingstone.com/music/news/deep-inside-the-unreal-world-of-lady-gaga-20110609?page=2
4 4.  dailymail.co.uk